Dungeon Crawler Carl Book 2 Read online

  Dungeon Crawler Carl Book 2: Carl's Doomsday Scenario (Ch 5-65) by DoctorHepa

  Category: Original

  Genre: Action, Adventure, Comedy, Dungeon, Fantasy, GameLit, Grimdark, LitRPG, Low Fantasy, Magic, Male Lead, Non-Human lead, Post Apocalyptic, Strategy, Strong Lead, Supernatural

  Status: In-Progress

  Published: 2020-01-22

  Updated: 2020-11-22

  Packaged: 2020-11-27 19:59:44

  Warnings: Gore, Profanity

  Chapters: 68

  Words: 283,691

  Publisher: www.royalroad.com

  Summary: Dungeon Crawler Carl Book 1 is now on Amazon!

  mybook.to/dungeoncrawlercarl

  Royal Road and Patreon is where to get the newest chapters and releases.

  The apocalypse will be televised!

  A man. His ex-girlfriend's cat. A sadistic game show unlike anything in the universe: a dungeon crawl where survival depends on killing your prey in the most entertaining way possible.

  In a flash, every human-erected construction on Earth—from Buckingham Palace to the tiniest of sheds—collapses in a heap, sinking into the ground.

  The buildings and all the people inside have all been atomized and transformed into the dungeon: an 18-level labyrinth filled with traps, monsters, and loot. A dungeon so enormous, it circles the entire globe.

  Only a few dare venture inside. But once you're in, you can't get out. And what's worse, each level has a time limit. You have but days to find a staircase to the next level down, or it's game over. In this game, it's not about your strength or your dexterity. It's about your followers, your views. Your clout. It's about building an audience and killing those goblins with style.

  You can't just survive here. You gotta survive big.

  You gotta fight with vigor, with excitement. You gotta make them stand up and cheer. And if you do have that "it" factor, you may just find yourself with a following. That's the only way to truly survive in this game—with the help of the loot boxes dropped upon you by the generous benefactors watching from across the galaxy.

  They call it Dungeon Crawler World. But for Carl, it's anything but a game.

  DCC Discord!

  10/01/20

  The first several chapters of DCC are now off of Royal Road because the book is on Amazon. I want to thank all of you for 9 months of amazing support. This is and Patreon will always be the place for the newest chapters and content, but to comply with Amazon's Kindle Unlimited policy, I can't have more than 10% of the story up here.

  This is a work in progress. Major editing will be done after the book is complete, so there will be egregious typos and parts that make no sense whatsoever. Please, please feel free to point any and all of these things out. Chapters WILL get edited, and that editing might break earlier chapters. I will attempt to keep readers apprised of all changes. Updates one-two days a week.

  Start Here for Book 2. Chapter 48 - Carl's Doomsday Scenario

  A note from DoctorHepa

  Welcome to Dungeon Crawler Carl, Book 2: Carl's Doomsday Scenario!

  Book 1 (which is part 1 and 2) is currently for sale on Amazon over here.

  Book 2: Carl's Doomsday Scenario

  “You do realize that thing is going to get you killed, right?” Odette asked after the conclusion of her show. Donut was currently chasing Mongo around the studio. The little dinosaur kept running head-first into the invisible wall and screaming. Lexis, Odette’s production assistant, had given the small monster a bow tie to wear on the show, and he’d practically bitten off her finger. The tie lasted about three seconds before he’d ripped it off.

  The taping had gone well. We started off by discussing the whole thing with the rage elemental. Then we talked about Mongo. Donut had trained him to stand quietly on her shoulder, and he’d mostly behaved himself. Mostly. Odette mentioned something about a magical pet carrier, which apparently was the dungeon’s equivalent of a pokeball. They were supposedly expensive, but it allowed us to put bonded pets into inventory without harming them. I didn’t care how much they cost. If we could afford it, it was going to be one of our first purchases. No more shoving Mongo into the gerbil cage and then sticking him in the bathroom so we couldn’t hear his shrieks while we slept.

  I knew what was coming next.

  After the segment on Mongo, I finally got to see a shortened version of the infamous Pork Boy Snick. Donut thought it was hilarious. The mysterious creator of the video had been very… generous… with my proportions. I’d been half-expecting the video to feature my feet prominently. I didn’t dare say it out loud, but I had this strange notion that the system AI might’ve had something to do with the video. But if it did, the video showed nothing to indicate it. In fact, it had clearly been produced by someone more interested in the Maestro than me, as he was the obvious subject of the video.

  “So,” Odette had said after we watched the scene and the audience’s uproarious laughter eased. “You are likely unaware of this, but Death Watch Extreme Dungeon Mayhem announced earlier that it was going into hiatus while the show restructured.”

  “I’m shocked,” Donut said. “Quite shocked.”

  The audience laughed.

  “King Rust of the Skull Empire, who recently arrived in earth orbit, has been oddly quiet about the controversy. A spokesperson for the royal family has requested people stop referring to the prince as ‘Carl’s Naughty Little Piggie,’” The audience roared, “But so far, nobody seems to be complying.” Odette turned to her audience. With her bug helmet, her face was expressionless, but I could hear the grin in her voice. “I would personally like to assure King Rust that I would never call Prince Maestro ‘Carl’s Naughty Little Piggie’ or ‘Pork Boy.’ And I would like to encourage my audience to never sink to that level. Again, it’s ‘Prince Maestro’ and not,” she held her hands out.

  “Carl’s Naughty Little Piggie!” the audience shouted, followed by peals of laughter.

  “Anyway,” Odette said. “What do you think about this, Carl?”

  “Look,” I said. “I don’t know anything about the Skull Clan or Empire or whatever, or this King guy. I’m sure he has a perfectly nice family and kingdom.” The audience laughed. “I don’t want any trouble with him and his people. But his son is a dick, and I called him out on it. Nothing more, and nothing less. I didn’t mean to cause an intergalactic incident. I know nothing about the video.”

  “So, to be clear, it is a snick,” Odette asked. “A lot of people seem to believe it’s real.”

  “If I was going to turn gay, it wouldn’t be with that guy.”

  The audience screamed. Odette nodded. “But you did challenge him to single combat.”

  “Yes, I did. And that offer still stands,” I said. “I still don’t know how any of this stuff works because you guys won’t tell me anything.” More laughter. “But I hope for the chance to face him one on one.”

  “We do too, don’t we?” Odette said.

  The audience cheered. Someone shouted, “Glurp, glurp!” A minute later the whole audience was glurping.

  Odette shook her head in mock disgust.

  The show soon ended after that. Like last time, Odette ushered Lexis out of the room so we could talk for a few minutes.

  “Is it worth it,” I asked, indicating the pet. “If he lives, I mean.”

  “You should’ve picked the Tummy Acher,” Odette said. “The little round guy with the mohawk. They’re very friendly and easy to work with. Plus they’re rare, and people love them. Once they’re full-grown, they are one of the best melee tanks in the game. But your Mongo is a solid choice. If you can keep him alive, he will be a vicious fighter.”

  “So,” I said. “I gave yo
ur message to Mordecai. He wasn’t too pleased with the idea of working for you.”

  She nodded sadly. “I saw. I watched you tell him. He had a few additional choice words for me after you left. He’ll come around. Tell him I understand his feelings on the matter, and I would love for the opportunity to explain myself.”

  “What happened between you two?” I asked.

  “We don’t have time to go into it,” Odette said. “But the short answer is I pushed him too hard, and he paid dearly for it. Anyway, you’re about to hit the all-important third floor.” She’d asked me on air if I knew what I was going to do, and I’d answered truthfully. I had no idea what was going to happen. Donut had lied and said she had it all planned out. “Do you really not know what you’re going to do?”

  “I don’t even know what my choices are going to be,” I said. “How can I decide?”

  She nodded. “When I decided to stay human, it lost me several viewers, but not too many. You’re in a tough position. Whatever you choose, make sure it has either a pathfinder skill or some sort of advanced mapping ability. Finding stairwells as quickly as possible will be crucial on further floors. It’s not going to be a problem on this third floor. Also,” she added. “Make sure Donut goes first. That way you can tailor your class selection on hers. I would ignore the AI’s advice for your race, but I’d take a careful look at whatever it suggests for your class.”

  “Hey,” I said. “Do you know anything about the Valtay Corporation?”

  She paused, cocking her head to the side. “Where did you hear about them?”

  I shrugged. “Just curious. I heard it somewhere.”

  She smiled, but without humor. “Be careful. If they are somehow contacting you or trying to get to you, be very cautious. They’re a corporate system government, and they’re the ones who currently have an entire fleet parked outside of the Borant system, ready to collect on the debt. They were hours away from initiating a full-scale collection action when the Kua-Tin stopped them in their tracks by starting the season early. They’re one of the most powerful entities in the universe. The next season is going to be run by them.”

  “Are they human?” I asked. I thought of Agatha. Was she one of these aliens? The idea seemed absurd.

  “No,” she said. “Not usually. They’re a parasitic lifeform. They do utilize human bodies, but their homeworld is aquatic, and they much prefer water-based hosts, such as the Kua-Tin or the Gleeners. They’re known for their technological advancements. Their version of Dungeon Crawler World is less goblins and trolls and more android death machines and pulse rifles.

  I contemplated telling her about Agatha, but I decided against it. I decided it would be best to just stay away from the woman the best I could.

  Mongo pounced and chomped directly onto Donut’s tail. She howled and started running in circles with Mongo still attached.

  Odette shook her head. “You’re gonna want to level that thing up as soon as you can. But make sure Donut has proper control over him first. Those little nibbles and nose chomps are cute now. They won’t be so adorable when he’s full-grown.”

  “Do you know how big he gets?”

  “You honestly don’t know what he is?” Odette asked. “He’s a pretty common creature across the universe. They always seed the human worlds with those guys and the others before the humans develop. Most human kids love these things.”

  “He’s a dinosaur of some sort. I know that much.”

  “He’s a dinosaur all right. Mongoliensis.” Her eyes flashed, in a similar way that Mordecai’s did when he was searching through his menus. “Ahh, I see,” she said after a moment. “The issue is the translation. ‘Mongoliensis’ is based off the scientific name. Your language had a more common name for those things.”

  The little chicken jumped up on Donut’s back and squawked.

  “You called them velociraptors.”

  I returned my gaze to the little monster. I’d been thrown off by the pink feathers and the beak. But now that she said it, I could see the monstrosity Mongo would soon become.

  “I mean, it’s obvious, isn’t it?”

  “Oh hell,” I finally said.

  She laughed.

  Donut came up to us, breathless. “Carl, is it time to go yet?”

  “There’s one last piece of advice I’d like to give,” Odette said, looking at the both of us. She paused, as if uncertain about what she was about to say. She’d changed on a dime, suddenly looking different, almost sad. “It’s just a suggestion. I don’t know if, morally, this is a good idea or not, but this will greatly increase your chances of survival. It’s something to look for during class selection. It’s generally only offered to crawlers with a high charisma, so if it’s available, it’ll be hidden somewhere amongst Donut’s choices. The problem is, if you pick it, it’s going to make someone very angry.”

  * * *

  Welcome, Crawler to the third floor.

  The previous level will collapse in 3 hours and 35 minutes.

  We teleported straight from the green room to a long, golden hallway reminiscent of the first hallway we entered.

  “Carl, look! We’re outside!” Donut said, looking up into the air.

  Sure enough, a dark sky rose above us, dotted with stars. A colorful nebula, reminiscent of the background image on Odette’s stage covered the sky.

  The air still felt stale. I pulled my slingshot, aimed it at the stars, and I fired.

  Plink. Sure enough, the rock bounced off the ceiling, about 25 feet up.

  “It’s an illusion,” I said. “It’s like that mall in Las Vegas. They make it look like you’re outside, but you’re really not.”

  “Well that’s disappointing,” Donut said.

  The walls and the ground were made of golden-colored bricks. A plush, red carpet led to a familiar door at the end of the hallway. As we approached, the door opened on its own. A tall figure stepped out, and all three of us stopped.

  A well-built, young and disgustingly handsome man wearing a tuxedo waited for us. His skin was a dusky gray, and he had a short pair of devil horns jutting from his forehead. The man stood about my height, and he had long, gray and black hair that was held back in a ponytail. A barbed tail poked from the rear of his tuxedo. A pair of black, bat-like wings sat folded tightly against his back.

  “Hello, Mordecai,” I said, examining his new form. “Jesus, dude. Looking good.”

  “Wow,” Donut said, looking him up and down. “I wouldn’t kick you out of bed for eating crackers.”

  Even Mongo’s customary screech sounded as if he was in awe.

  Mordecai – Incubus. Level 50.

  Guildmaster of this guildhall.

  This is a Non-Combatant NPC.

  Also known as the Gigachad of the Over City, Incubi are the male counterparts of the infamous Succubus. The smooth, seductive, and ultimately deadly Incubus can be identified by his stunning good looks, exquisite charm, and sensuous feet. They can only be found on the urban levels of the dungeon. They give new meaning to the phrase, “hit it and quit it.”

  “Princess Donut, Carl, little Mongo, welcome to the third floor. The training levels have concluded. Now the games may truly begin,” Mordecai said, bowing slightly. Even his voice had gotten deeper. He indicated for us to enter.

  We walked inside, and the door closed behind us.

  “Training levels?” I said. “For fuck’s sake. You call those training levels?”

  “Oh thank goodness,” Mordecai said once the door closed. He ripped the jacket off and pulled off the tie, unbuttoning the top three buttons. The jacket was odd, with a pair of long slits along the back to accommodate his wings. “I thought you two were never going to show up. I’ve been in this thing for three hours waiting for you. I hate formal wear.”

  “The interview ran long,” I said. “I take it the general public can’t watch this part?”

  “Nope,” he said. “They’ll watch you go in, and they’ll watch you come out, but they don’
t get to see what’s going on inside. It’s like a jury room.”

  His room was exactly the same as it had always been, but he’d cleaned up even further. A pair of beds had magically appeared since the last time we’d been in here.

  “Those are for the transformation, if required,” he said. “Remember what happened with Donut when she took that enhanced pet biscuit?”

  I swallowed, remembering the weird, gooey blob thing she’d transformed into before.

  “So,” Mordecai said. “Have you decided who wants to go first? I suggest Princess…”

  “Me,” Donut said, jumping up on one of the beds. “Let’s get this rolling.”

  “Okay, Carl, take a seat,” Mordecai said. I sat in one of the chairs. Mongo jumped on my lap and squeaked, sounding concerned.

  “Mommy will be okay,” Donut said. “You hang out with Uncle Carl for a few minutes while I get some work done. Behave yourself.”

  The baby velociraptor settled into my lap. I suddenly felt uncomfortable having that many teeth so close to my crotch. If he bit me now, I didn’t know what was going to happen. I suspected he wouldn’t teleport away. Instead, he’d get frozen like Frank and Maggie had that one time. Hopefully, I wouldn’t find out.

  “Okay,” Mordecai said. He waved his hand, and a screen appeared floating in the air, like we were on Odette’s show. “Your current race is ‘cat.’ This is a list of all the available races you may choose. It looks like you’ve been given 320 different choices. It is in alphabetical order, and you may click on any of them to drill down to a very specific set of details. Also, the system AI has narrowed it down to a set of three recommendations. We will spend the next hour or so going over these choices, and then I will…”

  “I choose cat. Next.”

  Mordecai took a deep breath. “Donut, there are a few choices on here where you’ll actually look mostly…”

  “Cat. Final answer. Let’s move on.”